Body Image and Self Esteem

I’m way too fat! These jeans would fit better if I was a size 5! I hate my stomach, my legs, and my whole body!!! Have you ever felt this way? Have you ever heard one of your friends make these statements? Well I am hearing this way too often in our society, body image has turned into everything for some especially in the western world. We are bombarded by the media which promotes images of women who have the ideal shape and form in magazines and television shows. If a larger sized woman is displayed then it’s most likely a joke involved…hehehe very funny. Let’s laugh at the overweight woman.  I wonder where they got the idea that all women want to be a size -2. It’s not real. It is a proven fact that most women are larger than the women the media displays. If you are an African woman fact is we once embraced a thicker woman but now the development of eating disorders are becoming more frequently seen in many African women! Please ladies we have to end this obsession!!!
I have never been skinny and honestly struggled with my body image for most of my teenage years. I was back then so ashamed of my body form that I did things to change and hide it from others. My insecurities caused me to do such things as wear clothes 3 sizes larger, I tried being bulimic for about 1 month but it didn’t go over so well because I hate the taste of vomit in my throat. I tried not eating at all which didn’t work as well because I can’t be in the same house, smelling fresh Egusi soup on the fire and not being able to eat it. I tried wearing girdles which were 2 sizes smaller then my size but eventually I started losing circulation in my legs and waist. Lol I have tried countless numbers of fad diets which required No eating, but drink this! Some of them have worked but they only fix the physical and do nothing for the mental. I did some soul searching during my senior year of high school right before college and I realized these lose weight fast diets were not working because I needed to work on the inside.
My self esteem began to grow when I started seeing women who were like me and worked it better then skinner girls. I started dressing in clothes which actually fit my figure and flattered every curve and handle bar. I began to notice that I was beautiful regardless of my size 18 and that number is nothing but that – a number. Being confident is fundamental in our survival of this funny thing called life. When it comes to beauty it is beyond the surface. A true beauty must embody the word and exude beauty in her communication, personality, and in the way she carries herself. Beauty is truly in the eye of the beholder. What may be ugly to one can be beautiful to another. I guess the moral of my story is to love yourself the way you are, be healthy and make sure your outer image displays the woman you are inside once u achieve that all other things will fall in line. Ladies do not look to society or a man to make you happy or confident, make you happy!!